Im Only Scared Of One Thing.........

Out of all the things there are in this world to be scared of,
I'm only scared of one thing.
That when I die.
I will walk up to my God and ask,
"Did I do what you asked me to do?"
And he will respond.
"Yes, but the truth is you could have been what ever you wanted to be."

Im not terrified of monsters or death.

Im not afraid of rejection or embarrassment.

Im not scared of commitment or difficult sacrifice.

Im scared that I am sacrificing everything for nothing.

Im afraid of lost opportunity.

Im terrified of never having the chance to be with you.

Night of the living dead.

My heart feels,
Or so I think.
My mind thinks,
Or so I feel. 
Some of us are scared of monsters with no heart beat.
I am scared of monsters that have one,
Because then we have something in common.
I am scared of monsters with a heartbeat,
Because that shows I could become one.
The monsters in my head are much scarier than the monsters underneath my bed. 

The four letter f word is "fine".

But really I am.

House of Bricks

Bricks, like stones, still break bones.

No Great Sacrifice

I promise that I would do anything for you.
I would climb any mountain.
I would work any job.
I would sacrifice my life.
But the truth is,
All of those things are easy to give.

The hardest thing for me to give is nothing.
I would do absolutely nothing for you.
I would walk away.
I would "forget" your birthday.
I would never ask you to prom.
I would never say your name.

I would do nothing for you.
To others that may seem like the easy task.
Giving nothing must sound like a pleasure,
but to me that is by far the hardest thing to do.

The only thing that I want to do,
Is serve you.
I just want to be there,
anywhere,
with you.
I want to give you everything that I have.
I want to share the beauty in this world with you.
I want your happiness over anything else in my life.

Thats why I would give you nothing.
I would walk alway,
because I know you could never eternally be happy with me.
I am so happy when I am with you,
and I want you to have the same.
Your happiness couldn't last with me.

I would go to hell to be with you,
Because I already live in it.
To me, hell would be no great sacrifice,
But I could never drag you down with me.

You deserve heaven. 

So I can't have my heaven with you. 

Here Is my great sacrifice.

I will give you nothing,

because I want you to have everything.

 P.S. I sorry that I may break my promise. I might still bring you gifts for your birthday. I will probably still help plan your wedding. I will always be there because I love you, and completely leaving would completely destroy me. Even if I cheat a little and still give you all the treasures I have. I won't ever tell you that "I love you". Not out of fear but out of hope. Hope that you will find someone that will give you what I can't, everlasting happiness. Please be happy, because that is my life's goal. Your happiness, even at the cost of mine. 

You.

Why is the world so beautiful?
And why does every beautiful thing make me think of you?